"I don't even want to touch that kind of grief, and I've seen it all."

My head turned slowly to the elder sitting beside me.

Her voice was solemn, so serious it almost scared me.

We were sitting at a dinner table, with about 9 of the 52 humans who had just spent a week singing together at a beautiful retreat center in the eastern woodlands of New York state.

Conversation was circling round as we each shared what we do…besides singing!

I said that I am an ecological consultant, write a newsletter to address ecological grief, and help people move from climate anxiety into mindful ecological action…

The woman beside me was a trauma therapist who had listened to the most horrific stories of survivors over the last 40+ years.

And here she was telling me that ecological grief scared her more than any of it.

Her voice cracked as she continued to speak: “you have a very high capacity for grief work if you can do that work daily with the Earth… my heart breaks when I think about what we’ve done.”

In that moment, her teary eyes watered a seed in my soul and I had a full body realization of purpose.

What she didn’t know was that I only signed up for that week-long singing retreat, despite the terror I felt around my own voice, because it offered a grief ritual in the middle of the week.

In the year since then, I have come to embrace the work of an Ecological Grief Tender.

It's why I am still doing Land Walk Consultations (in-person and virtual), where grief is found in the guilt of "not doing enough" to save the planet on one little patch. Or in the feeling of loneliness in this effort, when the truth is that everyone I meet cares more than you can imagine.

Ecological grief is why I created the entire EarthCare ecosystem...

📰 My newsletter, EarthCare Matters, for Nature lovers who want to make a difference

🧭 The EarthCare Compass - my core framework and navigational tool for working with Nature

🦋 EarthCare Matters Seasonal ZINE - a free graphic publication to inspire connection

📚The EarthCare Library - a digital toolbox of guides and resources to take action

🕊️ The EarthCare Journey - a year of support to make an ecological impact

🪏 and the EarthCare Professionals Collective - a business support membership for land-based contractors and businesses

These are all products and programs accessible to anyone in the world, designed to encourage and inspire mindful ecological action, as a way to metabolize your grief, and use it like compost to nourish the land.

At the root of my story, grief is why I am now hosting monthly song circles called Earth Songs.

• ​Join us in-person on September 22nd (near Harrisburg, PA) for the fall equinox to invite the balancing of grief and gratitude.
• Or click here to get updated on the next circles​

Community singing is one of the most effective heart-healers I've ever found. And there's a ton of science to back this up. The benefits are so tangible that I've jumped in full-swing and I'm seeing where the songs take me. Check out our new logo!

Grief - the way it gets lodged in the body, and how it blocks us up - is why I'm co-hosting a day retreat with Sofia Dugas called Reclaim Your Voice on September 13th*

*The deadline to register for the Reclaim Your Voice day retreat has been extended! We have 6 amazing women and we would love to invite a few more! Sliding scale pricing available <3

This event names the process I’ve been going through, and so many of us need. Reclaiming our voices is powerful work, and it brings us face to face with our purpose.

My work and purpose are looking like facilitating more events and spaces where we can return to a more oral culture, a more rooted way of being human, and a body-first orientation to this world…

Which is, in itself, an ecological endeavour:

The path of tending the grief in my body and for the land has taken me on a wild journey, and it’s still emerging… I am going deeper into it this fall, and have no idea what to expect.

It is something I am still finding the words to describe. But I’ve developed a significant capacity for it, and others see it too.

At the beginning of this year, I didn't imagine that these were the types of events that I would be most passionate about sharing with you, but I'm letting it flow.

And I am so grateful to that elder who brought it to my attention at a time where I felt like grief was an ocean that might drown me... and for the songs that have lifted me.

August 30th was National Grief Awareness Day, which inspired me to tell this story.

Now I want to hear your story, Reader.

Do you experience ecological grief?

What does it feel like?

How do you tend it?

Have you ever experienced the watering of a seed in your soul that showed you a part of your purpose?

Has someone told you something about yourself that surprised you?

How does your story go?

With all my heart,

Kendra

Ps. It's my birthday month! I would be so delighted if you'd choose to spend time with the land, and if you need support, I hope you choose something I'm offering here too. Much love.

Written by a human - Kendra Marie Hoffman

Supported by an all-human team!

"There is a power and honour to grief, because it means that we have loved something, and we’ve had a connection to a place or species of the planet. We need to find ways to mark our loss and share our loss, but also to remind ourselves that we only grieve what we love."

— Ashlee Conseleo (from The Guardian, "How scientists are coping with 'ecological grief'")